For the last few months, I have been feeling a tad bit lost... I'm not really sure lost is the right word, but it fits well enough and so for now I will use it. I keep having the feeling that no matter how I use my time, it is not a good use of it. This could be just some illogical snippet of my mind that won't let me rest entirely. Or it could be some deep inner struggling trying to get out... "I don't know" has been my mantra through this whole issue though. Am I using my time unwisely? "I don't know." If I weren't doing what I am doing now, what would I be doing? "I don't know." Why do I feel like I am in such a funk? "I don't know." and on and on.
So... I decided, along with the counsel of my wife, that I should shake things up a little. First off, I have uninstalled all but two or three games on both my Laptop and my Desktop. It felt like I was burning a security blanket. I had mixed feelings. I spent (wasted) long hours tracking down, installing, and testing those games to make sure those games worked, and then I haven't really taken the chance to play hardly any of them. Having taken an economics course, I know the time I plunged into that effort is now considered a "sunk cost" and I shouldn't feel so bad about moving on with my life. But it is still hard.
Second thing I have done is I have set my home page as something other than facebook. For the LAST (approx.) FOUR YEARS, my home page has been facebook. But frankly, when viewed from a lifehacking perspective, that is a horrible thing to do. Every time I get on the internet to do something specific I have to go through the attention minefield that is facebook. All it takes is one enticing looking post and I'm finished, 15 minutes are automatically sucked away from my life as I scroll down the endless series of updates till I find where I left off. Now I have to actually go seek out facebook when I want to message a friend etc... Which hopefully will mean that when I go to facebook, it will be with a purpose unto itself, rather than a purposeless wandering, or a risky passing by.
These two changes have gone over smoothly enough for the first day. Of course, I've had plenty of other things to keep my mind occupied today, what with my car dying, then figuring out how to get to work and get home from work, how to get a new car and soon, and on top of all that, preparing to move across town on Wednesday and fixing my bike which has been out of commission since October 2011. Ahh, I remember that week well, On Monday the back tire on my bike went flat. On Tuesday, I take the car to school, it was a frosty morning and as I tried to go through a low visibility intersection I got T-Boned. And on Friday I proposed to the woman who was to become my wife the following March. I imagine this week will be nearly as eventful as that one was.
Well, It looks like I am back to rambling on this old blog since It is one of my new home page selections. We will see how long I can keep it up, though I promise you nothing. I make no promises this time regarding length, content, or frequency of posting, just some insight into the brain of Floyd aka Stealth Blue. Enjoy, for what it's worth.
~Floyd
